Product Review -Electric sharpener

Synonym to pencil usage is the sharpener usage ! The new US electric sharpener works on battery(4 AA ) or  USB power cable.


 I have so far used only the USB cable. It is pretty simple and easy to use. Connect the USB cable , insert pencil , and the blade starts rotating immediately. You can use it with regular graphite pencils or the colored art pencil.

This sharpener is easy to use, quiet, compact, portable and durable.
 The package includes replacement blade.

One thing I noticed is that during the sharpening of pencil, the graphite remains there and doesn't move making it difficult each time to take the pencil out and check if it is sharp enough.

Rest all is fine. It is a good add -on to the stationery items at home or office!

You can find the product here!

Celebrations at home

The aroma of ghee had spread so far and wide that even before I entered home from school, I knew my mom had made something delicious that I couldn't resist asking!

"Amma, what did you make today?", I asked with an eager smile on my face. My mom was expecting the question. 

"I made something that you like, but first wash your hands and feet." Not ready to wait anymore, I quickly washed my hands, face, feet and came to the dining area. 

"Amma, now tell me, what did you make today?" Just then, my atha got me some tea and amma brought me a plate with yummy stuff. 

"Molu (as I am fondly called at home), atha made murukku. Mom always talks about what others did first. "I made ribbon pakoda, badhusha and mysore pak." She sounded little tired but very happy and satisfied. I sensed she must have had a real long day.

For every function at home, Mom always takes a day off prior to it and ensures that all arrangements are done properly. And to top it, she prepares the sweets and savories all by herself. And they were always delicious...slurrrp :) 

I always wondered as to why she spent so much of her time and energy in preparing all these snacks when we can buy it at the shop. What was the reason that in-spite of her busy schedule, she always tries to ensure that festivals are celebrated in full spirit! It took me few more years in life to understand the real reason behind it! 

The festivals that we celebrate at home are for family bonding and thanksgiving. It is also a time to remember and appreciate our inherited culture and values. Festivals bring in lot of joy and happiness. The preparations for any festival  starts much in advance and right from kids to adults everyone look forward to it. Every activity related to the preparations and our involvement in the same, brings in much more happiness which cannot be obtained by the act of purchasing from shop and eating at home. When cooking at home the entire family contributes to it, waits to taste the outcome, and give feedback. The mysore pak at the shop might be tastier than the one made at home, but the latter has all the love and care that someone puts in for you and it brings everyone together! 

Likewise when we do some pooja(prayers) at home, even the kids are excited to be part of it. Fasting until pooja teaches us many things, how to restrain ourselves from temptations, how to be self controlled, most importantly brings in lot of patience. It is not without any reason that our forefathers brought in many traditions and customs. The liberal intellectuals might find fault with many or even all of it. But finally all that matters is what brings happiness! In following the traditions, we also show our next generation the customs and rituals that we are associated with. 

When I took a bite of the sweet that my mom gave me, hmm...  delicious, it was hard on the outside, but yummy inside!! The perfect taste, the taste that I would never ever forget, for it was the hard work and love of my beloved mother.

Years passed by and now for this year's Krishna Jayanthi festival, as I am busy emulating my mom in preparing the food and pooja the way she does,  I hear a voice at the background, I turn and look. 

"Amma, what are you making today", my daughter asked me. My role has changed from a daughter to a mom and it is now my turn to give her what my mom had given me all these years!

Take it easy!

Take it easy! A simple but  powerful phrase.  How many times have we heard this or said this to someone ? Taking it easy is not something that all can do! I have seen many parents complain that their kids take things very easy, doesn't stress at all! These days I hear that more from friends who say the same about their spouse :)

Growing up in a joint family is a blessing in disguise; for you see different personalities even before you step out of home! Having seen different shades of people in the family and outside, I can vouch that there are very few whom I know have the true Take it easy attitude.

Each phase of life, we all have targets in life. Even when we were kids, we have had targets aka-milestones. Few weeks late in reaching any milestone, how many of us were not subjected to tests?
Start schooling, complete education, get married, have kids, take loan, buy a home and work for another 30 years to repay the amount; Right from birth to death, these targets in life make  us run all the time! The target never seems to end though!

If a target is missed, what next ? The answer lies somewhere, where nobody looks for! What if someone reaches the target before me? what will the society think of me that I missed the target? What if I can never come up in life since I missed the target? What if's similar to these are the ones that mess up our lives forever!

I am not saying that targets are unnecessary. For many achievers targets helped them achieve things that otherwise would have been impossible. But setting up a target should be something that comes out of own interest rather than being something imposed on. Getting a rank in 10th or 12th standard exams was always a target set upon students. The love and passion makes it easy to achieve targets. Imagine if a person is forced to play a game for some marks,would the person ever have the same passion for it? I doubt. Education, sports or anything for that matter done out of compulsion will take us nowhere.

There are few whom I admire for the very fact that they just live their life each moment;not worrying about anything in the future. Like cricketers playing for each session in a test match, taking things one at a time will bring lot of inner peace within us. Running around all the time, make money, pay EMI, get another one, run, run run , when do we live?

Post retirement, I have seen many elders saying that they have spent their entire lives for children; really? Was it the children who forced you to live a stressful life? Providing children with basic comforts is what is required. Teach them the lessons of life, make them realize the value of money. Show them how to love others. Your life should be an example for them to emulate.They need your support more than the savings that you make. Be available to them when they need you the most. Your present day will be a memory for them tomorrow, make it a cherishing one. Take things easy, worry only for things that you cannot change; not about the things that you can if you change your targets!


 Live life today like there is no tomorrow, your life will be beautiful!! 

The Good, Bad and the Ugly conversations ..

One thing that keeps me busy these days is the whatsapp app in my phone. I have talked about it in many of my posts. Still I keep repeating it because it has become so much part of my daily routine to send and receive messages in it. What once appeared as a boon to get connected with long lost friends and extended family, looks like a bane these days!

Sit across the globe, open the app, type the words of your choice; you can both make or break a day for the other person. Any quick question, you ask, you get instant answers; good things to share, the joy is doubled with lots of encouragement; bad things - the mood gets better with words of advice and concern. So far so good. But there is flip side as well! Were we not taught by the teachers at school to just read everything once before we submit our final answers? How many times has that been stressed? In reality how many follow that?  Before assuming anything, it is also important to understand that there is also something called asking. To err is human, it just takes few seconds to ask what was the meaning or why was something done? Who does it these days? I am managing 5 -6 whats app group as admin. Sometimes I wonder if managing school  kids is easier, for I know how to handle kids much better than the egoistic adults.

Some messages in whatsapp or any social media for that matter is meant to provoke others, no am not talking of all secular vs. communal ones. I am talking of the egoistic adults who try to do a one way communication more like a broadcast - In a TV or radio, you can only hear /see the news , you have the option to either listen or just change the channel. There are many silent ones in the group who do that. But there are few others who are least interested in such useless communications, and who respond back. When you have the right to speak out, be prepared to listen as well. I am reminded of the three monkeys - no see, no hear, no speak. What if the monkey closes ears,eyes, mouth and continues to write some utter nonsense, not willing to take any feedback! This happens many times. There are some who get pleasure in writing some real nasty stuff meant to provoke other members in the group, initiate a debate and prove a point or two! Social media groups these days are becoming either redundant or the active ones have some problematic people like I mentioned before.

When a group is formed initially, everyone gets so excited that they share all good things. It doesn't take much of a time in each group to get a person who spoils the mood of the entire group. A recent incident made me feel that I as an admin should have removed a person from the group long back to keep the spirit of the group going! That was a definite miss on my part! For I saw only the good even when the conversations started turning bad; But I never expected it to turn so ugly that the person literally abused many others in the group. Technology alone cannot make people join together, some are best left alone! holds true even for all social media channels. You  just cannot be friends of some people no matter how hard you try! 

Spa at home with the Shir home bath brush

I ordered this body brush for 2 purpose - 1. To help me reach places, I normally cannot 2- For the cellulite massager. This brush and massager looks nice in bright pink color. I really wish the package had some instructions for a first time user like me. However it didn't take me much of time to figure out.

First thing I tried was the cellulite massager. I applied some oil and did circular massage for a minute in the areas needed, I really felt good doing that. It would take quite sometime for the results to show up. But it does feel good when you start something nice. It doesn't work well for me on dry skin. With oil it does!

       

The next thing is the long handle brush, that has bristles which helps in opening the pores.Standing in the shower and brushing makes my skin feel fresh. Looks like there is a lot more blood circulation when I use this.

Bathing has become a spa experience now :) I would continue using this and would update the review for visible changes in my cellulite levels. 

Gardspo expandable hose

Every time over the last few years, I buy a new hose, I always wished that the hose would be light to carry. This Gardspo expandable hose is super light!

Ordered the product in Amazon, and it was neatly packed and sent to me. The package contained a 50 feet hose, a nozzle spray and a hose holder. The hose holder can be fixed to the wall and the hose nozzle can be placed onto it. The nozzle has 9 -settings - that is helpful for a variety of jobs like washing car, watering plants, cleaning floor etc.





From the usage so far, I find the hose to be completely leak proof, flexible and definitely a space saver! The water drains off quickly, and the hose shrinks in less than few minutes. Keeping home and surroundings clean is possible with this hose! You can find the product here!

Hmmm.. Hmmmm..

Person 2:Hmm.. Hmm.. Hmm..
Person 1: anything else?
Person 2: hmm.. nothing..
Person 1: ok then.. it was nice talking to you ..will catch up soon.. bye
Person 2: hmm..bye

How many of you have ended up like person 2 in a conversation? I bet many of you are like me when it comes to talking to a person who is neither a stranger nor a close one. The other person would normally have to both initiate and end the conversation. Being silent in a conversation doesn't mean that the person is actually quiet. Being silent  does not mean the other person is boring and this person  is not interested to talk. Being silent also does not mean that there is some problem with the language skills. Being silent just means the person needs some more time to engage with others. The exact amount of time varies from person to person. Being silent also means that the person is not so extrovert that he/she can strike instant conversation with anyone. There are many instances when people get offended because the other person failed to respond in a conversation. Even I have encountered many such situations. When I meet people who are also of type 2, I  try to turn myself into type 1 and initiate the conversations. When I get the response, I would continue the conversation. When I do not  get the response that I expected, I quietly turn to be a type 2 person again. It takes a lot of effort and a lot of patience to start and end the conversations.There are few who had it in them from the very beginning to be of type 1 person, while few others have mastered the art. There are few others as well who quietly change their personality according to the situation. The conversation will be  interesting only if we have persons of both types in it. Imagine if all of are type 1 , then the conversation will go hyper :) like wise all of type 2 would end up being like a slow motion movie .. It is this variety in human that makes talking both interesting and informative ! So all you type 1 folks, anyone ready for a conversation? I am ready to say hmm.. :) 

Easy@Home Digital Wrist Blood Pressure Monitor - Product Testing Review

In line with buying home based medical equipment, the next in line to buy was a BP monitor. It was then that I got an offer to do product testing of this equipment. To start with the transaction was pleasant with Amazon seller. It arrived on time, and the package was neatly packed and sent to me.

The BP monitor comes in a regular case with 2 AA batteries and a hand cuff with Velcro strap. The monitor has to be tied to our wrist, and the size can be adjusted with the Velcro strap.

Switch on the monitor. The first time, it asks you to set up date, time etc. There is a user manual with the kit. However this is pretty simple, that I never used the manual. To make it easy, you can follow the steps in the user manual and set up the date, time etc. Once that is done, you can start with your regular monitoring.


Sit erect in a relaxed position, tie it to your wrist, start the monitor. The equipment starts with a noise, and there is some pressure felt. Within seconds you can see the results in the monitor screen. The readings were almost similar with the clinical readings that we had taken few days back. That is simply awesome. Never expected a simple and easy to use monitor that also gives almost accurate results. This is definitely working good and has so far exceeded my expectations.

You can find the product here!

No more tying shoe laces- Check this out!

The regular shoe laces were just so boring! Hence I decided to try this. The order was delivered on time and was neatly packed. I opened it. I found this set of laces. They were of different sizes(numbers), to fit in according to the width of the shoes. I ordered for the black set. I took sometime to understand how to use them and found it really simple and easy to insert. The shoe laces once inserted remains firm. This lace has quietly replaced my original ones. Now no more tying around the laces, this has made my life so easy. I hope to order another color soon for my hubby as well. They are stretchable, flexible but remains firm as well. A good buy indeed! Check this out here!

For odor free shoes and boots try these deodrizer bags from Sagano!

The first time I saw this, I thought to myself this must be another gimmick and would not work as promised. I was completely wrong.

 I had a pair of shoes that I hadn't used for a long time, and what better than that to use this deodorizer bag. I used the pair for the shoes, and the odor from it is all gone! Inspired by this, I am now using it for another pair of shoes, and so far it has been great.

It would be really great if this works for couple of years as mentioned in the description. What is so amazing is that it is bamboo activated charcoal, chemical free and works against microbial growth and prevents allergens. It works great in reducing the moisture build up.So far, the product has definitely impressed me, a thumbs up to this !

This product is available here, check it out sometime! 

The other side of a mirror

Veda (name changed), a lovely lady in her early 30's was standing behind me waiting for coffee at our office cafeteria. That was the first time I met her. Both of us were the only ladies in the crowd and so we sat together for a cup of coffee! We both were new to the office. For no apparent reason we became lunch mates and later shopping buddies too :) Both of us were married, and both of us wouldn't talk about our families. For some reason, we never spoke about life after office hours. One day as I was completing my work and about to leave, my hubby called me to inform that he might be late and wouldn't be able to pick me up that day. With a light grim on my face, I started walking. It was then Veda called me. I looked back, and she asked me why I was still at office. I told her that am about to leave as hubby would be late. She offered me a lift if I could wait for 10 mins. I was more than happy to wait for 10 minutes than get into an auto and bargain for the extra amount later! I went near her desk and found that she had pics of all goddesses (only female deities) in that. I couldn't resist myself from asking her why she preferred all female deities :) She told me she believed only in Shakti power! Before I could further ask her any questions, she shut down her system and we were good to go.

That was the beginning of us getting to know each other well. She was a strong lady or rather I would call her bold and beautiful! She doesn't like people asking her too many questions about her personal beliefs or her life. She never did that too! But again, not all are Veda, including me! We all love to hear stories about others and would like to opine about them even if its unwarranted. In a casual chat with few other ladies in cafeteria, she raised a valid point, which not many would agree. Do not at any point of time, think of someone as someone else, that sucks! Each relationship has its place. A mom will always be a mom; you cannot compare anyone as your mom! Likewise, spouse, child, in-laws, friends everyone has a special place in our lives. It is when we mix it up, the real problem starts. How true, if I expect my mom-in law to be mom, I would never be happy. She has her own daughter. But if I accept her as a mom-in law, she would be just perfect! Accepting people for whom they are is the first step towards a strong relationship. If one tends to find flaws even for small things, the relationship breaks even before it begins! Talking to Veda was always a pleasure, she has immense knowledge on various things. One day as usual while having coffee with other ladies, the topic of raising kids came up. Both I and Veda suddenly turned silent while other ladies continued the conversation. Only then did we realize that both of us had same problem - both of us did not have kids then!  She was just like me, didn't want to have kids soon, and then later had some health issues, because of which couldn't have one! We were truly shocked to know that we faced same health issues and how we overcame them with the support of our spouses.

 Infertility is an issue that affects a vast majority of the young women in IT today. With little or no support system, and stressful work, health takes a back seat. All married couple love to have their own offspring at some point of time. It is best left to their choice on how and when to have! Generally, men do not get to answer this question. I always sympathize and empathize with women on this. When are you planning to have? Do you have any problem? Girls of your age group have already had two kids! Excuse me, if you are not going to be a support system, better stay away from these stupid questions. There are few who have genuine concerns on this issue, but how many are those? I remember vaguely, after the birth of my twins, I spoke to a relative wishing them on new year. The relative was not so happy that we had twins. Her son, who was of my age group was yet to have one. In a mild tone she told me there could be celebrations at your home, not here! How mean that was! New year brings in new hope, aspirations and lots of joy. Why would someone show all frustrations on that day to someone else! Have I ever shown my problem to you, why would I have to take that from you then, was my reaction!

We are like mirrors, someone smiles in front of us, we do that back. If someone shows their anger at us, we just do the same! But then each mirror has a different side- the side that is not revealed to others who stand in front of it.  Each day you might meet different people. Not all can be your friends for life. Not all would like to know about your details nor share their personal details with you!  Every mirror is fragile too, so instead of trying to find the other side of it, better we try not to break it! 

Bringing back the memories!

Whenever hubby dear goes to some new place alone or we go together, one thing that I keep stressing is buying something from that place. Souvenirs I understand means memories in French. I have always wondered during my school days as to why mom spends so much on buying souvenirs or mementos from the places we travel. Why doesn't she just get me something else ..like an extra  dress.. or some extra ice cream may be? My first remembrance of a souvenir is a Taj Mahal replica that we bought at Agra. Mom and Dad were so thrilled to open the gift box and show it to our family in Chennai. They spoke about all that the shop keeper had told them. It didn't matter to me about the material of the replica, the cost or anything at that time. All that mattered to me was my vacation was over and its back to school time! I wanted to tell my friends about the visit to Taj Mahal and nearby places in New Delhi. Like any other kid, I forgot about the trip very soon. But even today that replica stands tall at my Chennai home among other items in the shelf. That replica was a matter of pride for my parents, not many had visited Taj Mahal then. This replica has been my inspiration all along to collect souvenirs. Now coming back to souvenirs that we have collected so far, the simplest yet the most collected item is the fridge magnets. We have a huge collection that it was impossible for us to carry everything with us when we moved to US earlier this year. We just got few of them. These collections more than being a symbol of pride, brings us back the good times that we spent earlier. A Hawaii magnet reminds us the wonderful week spent at Maui, the Egyptian pyramid replica gives me a smile, makes me feel happy that I had in fact been to a wonder of the world! Buying souvenirs not just for us, but even for our dear ones is a way to show them that they are very much part of us , and we remember them all the time! I am looking at my shelf now and see there is enough space for few more to fit in there. On the lookout for a new vacation place and a souvenir shop there , hubby dear, where are u :)

Limm Exercise Resistance Loop

This time I chose a product that I believe would help me shed some weight and help me in achieving my dream of being fit! I chose #limmloopbands as part of product testing from amazon.
Being Amazon prime member, I received this product within two days. I was all excited to open the packing. It was neatly packed and sent to me.
I opened the pack and found a pouch with 5 loops in different colors. I didn't understand the logic behind 5 colors and immediately referred their notes. It was only then I realized that each color was for each type of resistance. The yellow was the extra light resistance,followed by green, blue, red and black (in increasing order of resistance). For a beginner like me, yellow or green would be ideal to start with. The loop looks durable. It looks like it might last for quite sometime. However with increasing resistance, you can always move to the next level loop. I am using it for stretch exercises now, for legs, arms etc. I found that this can be used for yoga, Pilates as well. Planning to use it more often and then will update here on the results, This is just the beginning of my exercise routine! Long way to go to achieve my dream of a fit me !!

Telecommute work- Try out Toptal!

For a perfect work-life balance, nothing works out like a telecommute job. After a sabbatical of nearly 2 years(since my pregnancy), I joined a start up company in Bengaluru, India's IT hub. Only then did I realize how cool it is to work from home. No more getting stuck in traffic, no more late night stay in office, and lot more to list. But then, the most important factor for me was spending more time with my twins. After having worked there for almost 2 years, I moved to USA sometime back in January, 2016. I waited for a while to get my EAD and then now started with my job hunt. I just found about this great site- https://www.toptal.com - I am impressed with the fact that unlike other similar sites, where we can easily post our resume,and then fight it out for projects, this site screens the candidates before adding them to their list of candidates. I am applying for manual testing with expertise in exploratory and context driven testing. I see some great companies offering work through toptal. I hope I end up working with them, the wait just begins!

A lady who inspires me to be self-motivated!

There is someone in everyone's life whom you cannot forget for some reason- good, bad or ugly! Someone who helped u grow, someone who inspires you or someone whom you hate the most! I do have a list of people whom I can fit into these categories. But there is one lady whom I can never forget nor do I wish to forget in life is my own Atha. When I say Atha, - wait she is neither my aunt or any relative.This is one lady who has seen only failures in life. When life fails her every time right from birth till now, she stood against it and has fought really hard. No education, no parents to support, no siblings to take care and no life partner to lean on, she has stood all alone and braved the odds. As a kid, she walked into our family, and now its been 5 decades she is with us. She has been part of our 5 generations, taking care of us each time and every time.
 A working mom's kid will always long for her presence at home, my atha ensured that we(me and my brother) never did ! 5 minutes late, she would walk all alone in search of us! No matter what time we leave home, 5 in the morning or 5 in the evening, she made sure that we are fully fed and carried something to eat, just in case we are hungry later! Fall sick, no doctor nor medicine could soothe you as much as when you are with her! Her hands have a magic- she touches, and you feel fresh! Not one or two days, she fasts for years together(Not taking Non-veg) just to see us settled. Anything that we wish for, a call away- Atha pray for us, and she does that all the time! Wait- is she demigod?- no negatives? She is just like you and I, she has her own flaws- gets angry easily, fights for petty things, loves food and the list is long :) But her affection towards us surpasses her flaws! Whenever I feel down and am in need of some pep talk- the first call would definitely be to my Atha- her words are so inspiring every time. She is the one who made me believe in myself- whenever I see failures in life, my atha always stood beside me, her words inspire me to face the challenges head-on.I am truly amazed at how someone with so much failures in life, can be a source of inspiration to someone else! It's her love , that does the magic! Truly blessed to have her in our lives! 

TripleBooster - Car Charger 7.2A 36W - For Long drives!

During long drives, every time myself and hubby found it difficult to charge our mobile phones. With a single slot, it was tough to charge my android phone and his iphone at the same time. With TripleBooster - Car Charger 7.2A 36W, charging has become very easy. It has made charging easy, we are able to charge all phones together.

Note: I received this product for free in exchange for my honest opinion.

Live Infinitely Infuser bottle -Product review

I was reading few healthy diet tips, which was when I received the offer to check this Live Infinitely infuser bottle. I immediately ordered it. The packing was neat and arrived on time. I opened the bottle and found it to be a simple bottle with no fancy stuff. It is a neat and simple bottle, plastic one. I removed the cover and there was this infuser. The packing had instructions and I just followed the same. I got lemon at home, I then cut the lemon slices and added water to the infuser bottle. Left them overnight, and morning I had what I wanted, the infused lemon water!  Lemon water with honey in the morning,Just the thing I wanted.I can't wait to try other fruits like water melon and orange infused water!

Note: I received this product for free or at a discount in exchange for my honest opinion.

Product testing begins soon!

After a long time, its time to do some reviews again! Yes, I am starting product reviews in this blog soon. From kitchen items to automobile spare parts, I would be indulging in some serious product testing and updating the results here soon. Stay tuned!!

Hello whatsapp

From the day, this app was introduced to me by my beloved, life has been completely different. Not a day passes when I either don't send or receive any messages. Mornings begin very early, thanks to all good morning messages, and now being in a different time zone, it begins the previous day evenings and extends till next day morning! From getting wishes and sending wishes to setting reminders , and gossiping life these days revolves around whatsapp. I really lost count of the number of whatsapp groups that I am part of, First began the group with immediate family, oh yes the immediate family is two groups after marriage, then came the extended family, school,college, workplace(past..n number of companies, current), apartment groups,  kids moms group, some x, y and z groups, it just keeps extending!! But the beautiful thing is it has brought a sense of togetherness. Whenever I need any info, it just takes few minutes to get the answer, and that too all from experienced ones!  Happiness is doubled and sadness is halved ! Whenever I feel down,through messages my near and dear ones make me feel comfortable, some even do a whatsapp call just to comfort me! Managing whatsapp group is sometimes so funny, I have seen many people who do not know how to argue or defend their position in any conversation exit the group, the easiest thing that anyone can do! If someone reads a message and you see a blue tick, without any reply, tons of questions arise in your mind as to why there is no reply. The reason could be as simple as the other person was busy! But unless the person sends a reply, one does not know for sure,if  the  person was hurt unintentional. Being a whatsapp addict these days, I can say one thing for sure, there are certain things that money can buy, for everything else , there is whatsapp :)

No Introduction, never mind, a smile is what it takes !

Back again with another mind voice, yup, I always had this in mind, and what better way than writing it out in my blog, my online diary!
I am a shy person, trust me, I am one! I always wait for someone to acknowledge me in a crowd, to start a conversation. I am very bad in starting a conversation and very boring in carrying it forward. Holding my mom's hand and travelling to any place was fun. But moving out from the comfort zone of family and meeting new people is always tough, more so when you are an introvert. Years back, I happened to attend a family function first time without my parents.That was after a gap of nearly 3 or 4 years, that I was attending a function(10th, 12th you are not  supposed to attend any functions ) I was able to recognize few of our distant relatives, but they weren't able to recognize me. I tried smiling, but then I couldn't, I felt like saying hi and introducing myself, but then I couldn't do that. How I wished my mom was with me, to make me feel comfortable. All she needed to do was say this is my daughter, but now it is a very big task for me!  I waited for long for someone in the family to introduce me to those relatives, but then none did that! Finally an old lady who was watching me for a long time, asked me ' Are you ..? " I was very happy that she recognized me finally. I wanted to talk more.She asked me if my mom was there, when I said no, she just said 'oh' and seemed to show no interest in talking with a teen later! This was the beginning of many such functions that I had to attend without parents, and things only got worse from then. Many a times, had to meet all new faces, all new characters and strike a conversation.I always envied some of my friends and cousins who could do that with ease. Things started improving only when I changed my approach. Instead of entering the place and waiting for some known people, I started entering places with a huge close up smile. Most of the time, people when they see someone smiling at them, automatically reciprocate, and that worked for me! No introduction,  no close circle, doesn't matter as long as you know to smile even at a stranger! 

Chasing the Mirage!

When I was around 10 years,our family went to Delhi for a vacation. On a sunny day we were travelling in an ambassador car when I first saw a shadow in the long distance. My car never reached it, how much ever distance the driver covered, the shadow seemed to be at some distance. I gave up my hope of reaching the shadow and finally asked my parents why our car could never reach the shadow at a distance. It was only then I got to know that it was a mirage, a shadow that never existed!
Looking back, I wonder how many times have I run behind something, which never really existed or which wasn't worth the run! While in 10th, the goal was to run for a seat in first group, and in 12th, it was for an engineering seat, then for a job, marriage, kids , and finally for a peaceful life. Running behind the mirage how many times have we lost the path to a better today! While in school, I had this habit of talking only in English language with my teachers and classmates, thanks to my first teacher who appreciated my language skills when I joined the school. This small appreciation and the subsequent ones later from different people made me a person to stand out from the rest of the crowd. Just to keep my language skills intact, I lost my student life. Those days in a government aided school,nobody preferred a friend who always spoke in a foreign language all the time. I could hardly communicate with any other classmates and most of the time ended up speaking to teachers! What was the reason? The feeling that if  I spoke native language I would lose my spoken English and I wouldn't be able to survive in the future. But what about the others who are in good position today? Well they learnt the language, lived their student life, and used the language as a communication tool whenever required. Live your present life, think about the future. I did the exact opposite, lived for the future and now thinking about the past! I just chased a mirage! 

Fake appreciations better than honest feedback!

I was at my friend's place for a function. While we were having a serious conversation her cousin came in and asked ,"How do I look?". Both I and my friend looked at her. The cousin had heavy make up and was wearing jewelry that didn't  suit her. I was about to say her that, my friend interrupted me and said, "Awesome, fabulous, you look great",I looked at my friend, she just smiled and nodded her head. The cousin seemed pretty happy, and she left the room. I couldn't resist asking her why she just lied! My friend as always smiled at me and said, "My cousin would have definitely taken feedback from others as well , I simply do not want to be the wrong person!  The wrong person? Seriously? Giving a honest feedback makes you the wrong person? I couldn't stop thinking about this incidence even after many months.I wondered how many times have I been the wrong person? Most of the time I might have ended up being the wrong person for the simple reason that I always gave honest feedback. Thinking hard ,I  realized that people prefer getting fake appreciations than any critical feedback! By giving what we call honest feedback we also become the "Bad or wrong person".Gradually people start avoiding us, for nobody likes criticisms. If I were them, I am not sure if I would take the criticism in the right spirit either. As another friend of mine once said it right, we do not belong to the honest feedback generation. You like or you don't like it, fake it with a smile!! This is how you end up being politically correct!

  

Befriend and Unfriend -- A button away!

Few months back, just like any other day, I logged into Facebook while I was working on my laptop. I suddenly saw a  post of a  friend with a tag of a person A I knew very well. I was little curious to see the post as in the recent past I hadn't seen any post from person A. When I clicked on the profile of person A, I discovered that I was no longer a friend of  person A! Phew! What , how and why?? Off late I hadn't paid much attention to person A's post or update, but still wondered what have I done wrong to be unfriended!!! Why did person A unfriend me, do I really deserve a snub like this ? Did I hurt person A in any way? Or did I do that myself by clicking any wrong button? Too many questions arose and I couldn't refrain myself from logging into other social media sites like Instagram, LinkedIn, Twitter etc. to check if person A was still connected to me.  I found it too embarrassing and my ego was hurt very much.  I had done this to too many , and little did I realize that they would have felt the same when I first accepted their request and then did the same unfriend.

Late realizations do happen and it then struck me that friends in Facebook are never real friends. Friends of friends become your friends just because you share something in common- a school, a college, a workplace, or even a family! The algorithm does it all for you and you just expand your network. A person who doesn't have even  5 real friends has a friend list of 500.  Posting and being active is again a social pressure. You wish your friends and like their updates. But when they don't reciprocate, you end up thinking why they didn't. Next, how many of us post a picture without any image editing work? how many of us post something in original? How many of us use it to showcase our sense of pride in achieving something? and how many of us just use it as tool to stay connected? Social media is just an illusion that shows us something that does not exist like a mirage. 100 likes for a photo or a status doesn't mean that you are awesome or what you did is extremely important for the mankind!, yet we post and expect the likes! We expect people to send us requests and then we decide whether to accept them as friends or not, we add some, reject some to boost our ego. I have seen people exiting groups , just to show to the world, that they are extremely important to the group and people must listen to them for them to be in the group.  It doesn't take much of a time to remove you from the same group, but people chose not to!